Resurrection

So, I've been absent for awhile. My bad. Shit happens.

For example, I've recently decided to renew the actually-made-from-corks corkboard project that Amy began our senior year of college. See my budding collection? If you are a wine drinker please begin saving your corks for me. I can't use those cheap-o plastic ones, only ones that are made out of actual cork. Hence the title of the project, The Actually-Made-From-Corks Corkboard.

Also, my brother got pulled over going 109 mph on the Lodge, called me to come get him, and because we'd both been at the bar (read: really shouldn't have been driving), the very lovely Michigan State Trooper that pulled him over found it somewhere in his heart not to give either of us DUIs, and instead merely gave Jess a speeding ticket. So there was that whole fiasco.

Nextly there's the fact that I am reading a new and very good book after having just finished a not-so-new but equally as good book. I miss reading and getting to talk to people about it a few days later. I actually (in my supreme and eternal dorkhood) still underline stuff in pencil that strikes me as important or moving or just plain nice when I am reading something. What did I just finish you ask? The Poisonwood Bible, by Barbara Kingsolver, quite good. What am I reading now you query?? A Million Little Pieces, by James Frey (you know, the one who "duped" Oprah? Apparently she had some trouble coming to terms with the fact that a recovering alcohol and crack addict may have had to fabricate parts of his memoir for emphasis or effect or perhaps because he's a recovering crack addict, I mean, how much can he possibly remember with total clarity anyway??).

Lastly there is the fact that lately I have become consumed with the desire to move out of my house, and, more specifically, in with Shaun. Not at his apartment because, and you may know this already if you saw the absolutely horrific pictures of what the management of his apartment complex did to his shower - eek, well because lets just say that the only 2 redeeming qualities about his apartment are that 1. he lives there, and 2. it's in Royal Oak, which is nice, but still, eek. I drive around and look out the car window and I think, "What does the inside of that house look like, and how much would it cost for us to buy it?" I try to think up compelling arguments to convince Shaun that we should move downtown, both because I believe it would be a wise investment and we'd make a ton-o-money off of selling something good in 5 years, and also because with every passing day I think the likelihood of me going to Wayne State to get my master's in a year and a half increases. He says, "No well in hell I am living downtown," and I say, "No way in hell I am living in Warren!" So we'll probably end up in Royal Oak or Berkley or Clawson or who the hell knows where.

Was that good enough for ya A.? I will try not to be so long next time, deepest apologies.

Mickey D's

This morning Shaun decided to stop at McDonald's on the way to work. The McDonald's we stopped at is one we usually skip, seeing as how they f*ck up the order 92% of the time, but since it is the most strategically located McDonald's in relation to Shaun's office, that's where he pulled in. His order was simple, a medium OJ and one hash brown. Finito. The ordering conversation went as follows:

McD: Can I take your order?

Shaun: Yeah, I'll have a medium OJ and a hash brown please.

McD: Is that an orange juice or an orange drink?

Shaun: Juice.
(At this point a small OJ order is showing on the screen, in spite of the fact that he ordered a medium.)

McD: And what else?

Shaun: A hash brown.

McD: Would you like sauce with that?
(At this point I giggle because who orders sauce with a freaking hash brown, which, incidentally, is still not appearing on the order screen.)

Shaun: No, just the hash brown.

McD: Did you say a breakfast burrito?
(Now I'm giggling again because it is clear that this person is an idiot in the best kind of way, namely one that will provide me with entertainment.)

Shaun: No, I said a hash brown. (Enunciating perfectly the two syllables that form HASH BROWN.)

McD: Is what you're ordering a sandwich, because I don't know what that is...?

Shaun: (Yelling at the order microphone) A HASH BROWN!!!

Finally his order appeared on the screen, still showing a small OJ instead of a medium, but I don't think he wanted to press his luck at that point. I was giggling so hard I was in tears until we pulled back out onto 14 Mile Rd. It was hilarious. Whether or not you'll be able to appreciate the humor from my retelling of the story remains to be seen, but take my word for it, it was hysterical.

The Best Things in Life Are Free

Perhaps it is a bit played out, but it's true all the same: the best things in life are indeed free. Matty and I experienced several examples of this on Friday night when we were hanging out. While minding our own business and drinking our brews at the Rock in Royal Oak we were suddenly bombarded by representatives from Sprint who showered us with *free* Super Bowl XL gear! We each got hats and long sleeve tees, neither of which I'd actually use, so that hat went to Jesse and the tee to Shaun. But after that we decided to head downtown to check out the official Super Bowl XL Insanity that had been going for a couple of days already. Matt works downtown and has a parking pass, and I talked us past the cover at the Anchor, and Kira being the super awesome and gracious gal that she is merely pooh-poohed me when I asked for our tab. The perks of knowing the family that owns the bar I suppose.

Now that the Super Bowl has come and gone (well, I suppose the Steelers fans are still partying it up big time downtown), I really hope that Detroit will be able to sustain some of the interest it has piqued with the whole event. It was so great to walk around downtown and see families out with their kids, and people bar hopping and just having a kick ass time. It's what a major city should feel like all the time. I'm proud of Detroit for doing us proud for the big game, and I just hope we can keep a little of that pride around, because that's what really helps.

In other news, Shaun and I went bowling last night and had a rockin' good time. It's crazy how much FUN I have with that man! Here's a picture of us having fun and looking cute at my work holiday party (which was stupefyingly LAME, in spite of the fact that they gave away a 50" plasma TV).

He is a much better bowler than me (read: he owns his very own pair of bowling shoes while I rent the dorky Day-Glo ones), but I actually didn't suck! I started off with a strike and managed to break 100 every game. Shaun finished by bowling his best game ever, and somehow still managed to be disappointed by his score. Men. (Just kidding baby!!)

Anyway, I am exhausted so I'm going to bed. If anyone has a any great pics from their adventures downtown this weekend I'd love to see them!

Sunday Morning Over Easy

There is something about Sunday mornings that I have always loved. At my mom and dad's house Sunday morning is a time for relaxation. You can sleep late if you want to, or you can wake up and read a few pages of whatever book you're in the middle of, or maybe a magazine or a newspaper. There's always coffee, and my mom makes breakfast. BLTs are a popular menu item, or the traditional eggs-bacon-toast-hash browns meal, with OJ and milk, of course. You'll hear 94.7 FM on the radio, with their "Sunday Morning Over Easy" show that ends at noon every week with the mandatory playing of "Angelo's Restaurant." My dad will putter around in the garage or play cards online, Jesse will sleep til 2 PM, and mom will cook and read.

This Sunday morning Shaun and I went to look at a little studio apartment in Royal Oak that I/we are thinking of renting for awhile. Then we went to get coffee at Caribou and shared the paper. I was thinking it could be a start to a new Sunday morning tradition of our own. Coffee and the paper at Caribou. Sounds like a plan to me....

Happy Birthday Jesse!

Happy 21st Birthday to my not-so-little-anymore Little Bro. Lord help us all, he's 21!

Raining Cats and Dogs

So I've learned that I pretty much hate dogs. All except for mine, of course, but even she gets on my nerves sometimes. This discovery came about around 4:30 this morning when I was asleep at Kira's house (I am house/dog/cat sitting for her and Jeff while they are in L.A. for her cousin's wedding) and woke up to the sound of one of her dogs, Blanca, whimpering and whining because she wanted to come into the bedroom and get into bed with me and Shaun. (Obnoxious Dog Feature #1, hereafter abbreviated as ODF #'s 2-whatever, dogs always have to be on top of you! When you're on the couch, when you're in your bed, wherever.)

We had a kid's safety gate at the doorway so they couldn't come in, and since they are used to sleeping in there, Blanca was upset. I got up and let her outside, but that didn't seem to be the problem, because the whining and whimpering and occasional barking and scratching at the baby gate continued with renewed vigor. (ODF #2, you have to get out of bed in the middle of the night in Michigan in the winter so that they don't shit and piss all over your house. We don't even do that with human children, they wear diapers.)

After another 30 minutes of moaning and whining and running back and forth between the front door and the bedroom door I thought, "well, maybe she still has to go," so I let her out again. She squatted 3 times before coming to the door, so I figured, "three times ought to just about cover it." On the way back to the bedroom I made sure she had water and that her bed and her cuddly guys were all there, and I showed her where we'd moved it to (out in the front room, with the other dog, who was becoming more and more awake every time I got up), just in case she'd failed to notice it there the 3,795 times she'd already walked by it. But she looked at me as if to say, "What? Are you retarded? That's not my bed. You're in my bed."

I went back and crawled back into bed with Shaun, but I was wide awake at that point. He was snoring, which I was glad to hear, because it meant that at least one of us (and the one of us that had to work today at that) was going to get more than 60 seconds of sleep. At 7:15, after getting up FIVE more times in efforts to get the dog to just SHUT THE F*CK UP already, I'd finally managed to fall back to sleep. The alarm went off at 7:30, we hit the snooze about 3 times, and at 8:00 when we were deciding to leave around 8:15 we realized that the clock in their bedroom is set 20 minutes fast. So we left anyway and went to get breakfast in a diner far, far away from any and all dogs.

As for that epic battle between cats and dogs, it is now abundantly clear to me that cats win, hands down, no contest. Cats are aloof, self sufficient, they make you earn their love, and they are fickle with it once it's been granted. A cat would never wake you up to make you let it outside in the middle of the night, it would just pad on over to its litter box, do its business, and then come cuddle with you again. When they make noise, it's quiet. Have you ever heard a neighbor complain about how your cat's purring is just keeping them all awake at night?? Um, no.

I miss my favorite cat of all time, Rosco. Dad brought him home from up north. He went hunting with Tony and they stopped at an Amish farm on the way back. Tony took one kitten, which Carrie and Nick named Ace, and we got one of his brothers, who turned out to be Rosco. He was sooooo cool! Unfortunately, he died when I was 14, and we haven't had another cat since, but I can't wait for Shaun and I to get a kitten when we get a place together. I put some pictures up of him, sleeping in an empty box under the Christmas tree, trying to eat my goldfish out of the bowl in my room, and then generally just looking cool. The last two are double exposed pics so they might look a little funny, but he was a funny cat.

Show Me the Money

OK seriously. The payroll department at work has f*cked up 3 of the last 4 of my paychecks, and now I am officially pissed off about it. The first time (4 checks ago) they shorted me four hours and some OT, totaling about $60. Since it was the first time it ever happened, and I wasn't pressed for the $60, I figured, "Hey, no biggie." They fixed it on my next check. Which had a new error of its own. That new error was really small, and came out to being about $5 short. Not really a big deal at all. The next check was OK, but the one I got today has pushed me over the edge. This time it's a full day short, which is more than $100.

One of the managers at work suggested that I try to, "make a case," to the payroll girl to try to convince them to issue it to me immediately in a seperate check -- as opposed to having to wait for it to appear on my next check in two weeks. I thought about that for a little while and then a realization hit me: SCREW THAT. I really, really, really need that $100. If I don't get it, I may be eating bread and water and hitchhiking to work because I won't be able to guy gas or food. But that is NOBODY'S business. There is no way in hell that I should have to go explain in detail to my manager and members of our HR and payroll departments how desperate my financial situation is right now. I need that money because I don't go to work each day for fun, I go because I get a paycheck every two weeks. I shouldn't have to 'make a case' for why I'd like to be paid money that they owe me for time that I worked.

Wish me luck when I go talk to them tomorrow. Flippin a-holes.

Go Ahead With Your Bad Self

Congrats on your acceptance to American University homie! I knew you could do it, now go kick some Republican ASS! XOXO

So, as you may have guessed from the celebratory collage of photos and corresponding caption, Nikki was just recently accepted at American University in Washington D.C., where she will begin work on her Master's in Public Policy degree later on this month. Way to go Nik! What a great way to start out 2006. I see big things for the year ahead, BIG THINGS!

It seems as if everyone is taking a moment to reflect on what happened in 2005 and what they want to happen in 2006, so I will do the same. What can I say about 2005? It was a steady year, no major life disasters, just a good, solid beginning to a lot of thigns. To a happier me. To a debt free future (thanks to Mom and Dad who let me live at their crib for free, and to the two jobs I've been working for a year now). I am thisclose to having all my credit card debt that I racked up while in college and South America paid off, I bought my very own car, and I *almost* pay all my bills on time every single month! AMAZING!

What else was great about '05? I got to see my friends do things they've been wanting to do forever -- Kira got married, Nik moved to D.C., Amy got a job at the Shedd, Aubs moved to Chicago and got a job she actually likes, Jetta made it home from Uzbekistan safe and sound and got a job she really loves, Brian and Steph are doing awesome in the Pacific Northwest. The list goes on and on.

But the best thing about 2005 was definitely meeting Shaun. I complain about my job an awful lot, but I know I shouldn't, because if I had never worked there then I never would have met him, and he's the best thing to happen to me in a long, long time. Maybe ever. He always knows how to make me laugh, he doesn't put up with me being a brat, he's romantic and mature and smart and fun and loves to dance with me, and loves his family, and his friends, and has a good heart and is just basically a great man. I have come so far from where I was last year at this time, and I so happy that I met him along the way, and that I get to keep moving forward with him in my life.

So, to Mom and Dad and Jesse, all my homies, and especially to Shaun, thanks for making 2005 a great year for me, and here's hopin' 2006 can be even better.

NYE 2005

Scenes from the fiesta

Christmas

So Christmas has come and gone. It was amazing! Hands down the best Christmas I've had in years, maybe ever. Mostly thanks to one man. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, you know him as that lovable former deejay, but those closest to him just call him Shaun. See how cute he is with my niece?? She's all decked out in her princess bling that she got from Santa (a.k.a. Grampa Steve). Joey got the toy he wanted the most, a Dyson vacuum cleaner. Don't ask. It's too complicated to explain. All I know is that the kid really loves to vacuum. He's an aficionado of vaccums, if there is such a thing, and Shannon and Daniel were having some trouble finding one for him (apparently the bidding on ebay hit something ridiculous like $150 -- for a toy vacumm), and then mom's friend said, "Well hey, I have one!" And he *freaked* out when he opened it up. Santa and Mrs. Claus saved the day on that one baby.

I think everyone had a good Christmas this year. We sent Mom and Dad to Green Bay so they can go visit her sisters over New Year's Eve (they left this morning). My Uncle Greg got my Aunt Georgana's wedding ring fixed (it's been broken for probably 7 years). I got Shaun tickets to go see Coldplay in February and he was genuinely surprised since he didn't even know they were coming back to town. And he gave me a beautiful necklace with a heart-shaped diamond pendant, a blue topaz ring, some goodies from Victoria's Secret (for his eyes only!), and he started a photo album for me with pictures of us in it. He even went to one of those scrapbooking stores to get the little decorations for the pages! (He found miniature Scrabble letters and spelled out our names!!! How great is that??)

My mom gave Shaun some new towels (thank God) and some cool beer mugs. He gave her a framed picture of himself with our dog that we took at Thanksgiving. Hilarious! It's sitting proudly displayed in the kitchen next to the telephone.

On Christmas Eve Shaun and I drove out to Romeo to have dinner with his mom and his sisters where the feasting and gift-giving continued. I think everyone liked all the gifts exchanged. I got some cool gift certificates to Borders and Starbucks and a *beautiful* beaded purse from his mom that I love! Christmas was spent at his dad's place with his side of the family which was also really cool (first time I met all of them). We ate and ate and ate some more. It was pretty much a weekend of major pigging out. But good pigging out. :) Why else do all that driving if there wasn't so much great food and fun company at the end of the car ride?

All in all I have to say it was a great Christmas. So full of fun and love and hugs and good food and family and friends. I couldn't have asked for more. Thanks everyone!

Exact Contents of My Purse

Lately I find myself rather uninspired when it comes to this blog. So this is an itemized list of the contents of my purse:

1. my cell phone
2. my keys
3. my tortoise shell sunglasses from UO
4. 3 CDs:
--Coldplay "Parachutes"
--System of a Down "Hypnotize
--Black Eyed Peas "Behind the Front"
5. my wallet
6. my checkbook
7. an unopened pack of Big Red
8. my Comcast ID badge
9. 2 nail files
10. a copy of The Phantom Tollbooth, by Norton Juster, dog-eared at page 201
11. lipgloss and lipstick in 6 varieties and colors
12. 2 letters from the law firm of Rancilio & Associates, one of them certified the other regular
13. one toothpick from some random restaurant, still in its cellophane wrapper
14. some Robitussin Cough & Cold liquid-filled capsules
15. Krazy Glue
16. travel size bottle of Pantene Volumizing hairspray
17. my 3 prescriptions
18. some hand lotion
19. 2 bottles of clear nailpolish
20. a mirror from Estee Lauder
21. 2 pens
22. my photo badge from Gap with a pic of me and Nik in it
23. 3 paystubs, 2 from Comcast and 1 from Gap
24. 7 bobby pins and 2 hair thingies
25. my watch
26. another cellophane wrapped toothpick
27. two silver rings, usually worn on my left thumb
... and last but not least,
28. some trash

Now, wasn't that interesting?

I know, I know, not really. Sorry about that. Let's try this instead. Shaun and I went to Meadowbrook Mansion to take the Christmas walk with his mom and this is a postcard he bought me from the gift shop:
It was sooooo cool. Shaun couldn't believe I'd never been before. The house is called an American castle, and rightfully so! Just look at all the damn chimneys on that roof! It was beautiful though. Thanks baby for taking me!

Complicated Congrats

So, Reader, as you may already know, I have a friend named Stephanie (she comments here with more frequency than most) and she has a boyfriend named Brian. The story does not end there, oh no! For in fact, I was friends with Brian long before he became Steph's main man (well, her only man really, she's a one man kind of gal). I modestly credit myself with their having gotten together. And don't question the grammar of that last statement, sometimes we can bend grammar for the sake of style. Ahem, I digress. So Brian and I became friends long ago, in a land far, far away, when we were still in high school and he began dating another of my friends, Kira (who you may remember from various and sundry previous entries, especially in August and September, since that is when she married her husband, Jeff, see photos by clicking the link at the right). At any rate (really Reader, I will try to stay more on track from now on), Brian and Stephanie are together and living in the Pacific Northwest and I miss them both tons and am excited to see them over the holiday. But last week I got a rather excited call from Bri because he is now an official member of the PGA (go Brian!!), which is an accomplishment he has been working his ASS off for since, well, for quite some time now. So here are some congratulatory pics of Brian, in HAWAII (on a business trip, real bummer huh?), playing golf on a golf course that was probably ridiculously AMAZING. Way to represent the Dirty D with the Lions hat Bri, good to know they have loyal fans, in spite of their incredible suckiness. You stupid HAW!

Tearjerker

So I am sick again. Bronchitis. Again. This time, by the mercy of God, it is not nearly as terrible as it was last March, when I wishing death upon myself on an hourly basis. So I stayed home from work. Watched some TV. Took a nice hot bath only to fall asleep in the tub and wake up chilly and wrinkled, which probably didn't help the bronchitis situation any. I watched a lot of movies today. "The Interpreter" was pretty good, but then again I almost always like Sean Penn (except for the fact that he spells his name the 'funny' way). I also watched Dennis Quaid (who my mom loves -- along with Kevin Costner) in "In Good Company" which was good -- especially since it didn't have the warm fuzzy ending I think everyone was expecting. It had a different warm fuzzy ending. But the kicker, as always, was a good, old-fashioned tearjerker, and one that I've seen about fifty times at that, "The Notebook."

What is it about those movies that will always seem to make you cry? No matter how many times you've seen them, you know what's coming, but it's still heartbreaking. I think there are five movies at this point in time that I can honestly say will always make me cry.

1. The Notebook
2. The English Patient
3. Braveheart
4. Legends of the Fall
5. Message in a Bottle

That Nicholas Sparks. Boy does he know how to make a woman sob! I wonder if he's married.... But back to the point. The point is that tonight, while lying in our big chair sniffling at the end of "The Notebook" I decided to call my baby, and even though he was playing cards with The Guys, he still got up to take the call and go, "Awww baby...." when I mumbled out, "I'm watching 'The *sob* No-hotebooook' *sniffle*!" Hahahaha. Could I be more of a chick or what??

I Just Love This Picture:

Of me and my Shaun. From Kira's wedding. He's making, "The Maria Face." I mean, how us is this? It just doesn't get any better than that!!

Christmas Lights

So today while I was getting ready for work I heard my dad call out, "Hey Big Girl (one of his many nicknames for me), come here and look at this!" Curious, I put down my hairbrush and came to the computer to see what it was, and it's crazy! (By the way, if you are at a speakerless computer, don't bother clicking the link. It's pointless without the sound.) Clark Griswold would be spellbound, humbled, utterly appreciative of such a spectacular light show, and its encore.

But can you imagine being old dude's neighbors?? Hope they get into the holiday spirit as much as he does!

Turkey Day '05

So Thanksgiving weekend has come and gone. I had the Wednesday before off and we were all going to go out but I decided to stay at home and rest and try to kick this stupid effing cold that I have that will NOT go away. (Clearly, the day of rest did the cold no good at all.) But it was nice to have a day off in the middle of the week. I caught up on my Nip\Tuck (holy *crap* I can't believe Kimber left Christian at the altar!) and helped my mom bake some stuf for the celebration the next day. It's amazing that our pumpkin chiffon pie didn't turn out like poo because I misread that recipe in every way possible. Somehow, it all turned out OK though. (Actually, it was better than OK, it was down right yummy.) Then I decided to make pumpkin bread with the leftover canned pumpkin and that came out INCREDIBLE! I pulled the recipe out of my fave cookbook (How to Cook Everything by Mark Bittman), which I recommend to everyone because it has never let me down. The recipes are easy, fun, and they all taste great. But I digress.

So on Thursday Shaun came over around 12:30 to watch the Lions play football. He said he at least had to watch, "until it's hopeless." It got hopeless pretty quick. I wonder what it'd be like to have a good football team to root for? Hmmmm. So we ate appetizers and drank some wine over here before heading out to the boonies to go have dinner with Shaun's fam. I love love love his family. We ate an amazing dinner and had some great desserts and Shaun took a little nap in front of the fireplace before we headed back to my house. Since Nik was in town we were all going to go out, but Shaun and I were so sleepy and full that we ended up leaving Nik and Gianny on their own and just cuddled up on the couch to watch "National Treasure." Which was pretty good. Ridiculously far-fetched, but entertaining nevertheless.

On Saturday I did a bunch of stuff. I had the day off but I went to go tutor my mom's boss's daughter (get that?) at 1:00. She needed some serious help with her Spanish. Yet another moment of truth that lets me know I am scarily out of practice!! I really need to look into a class at OCC or something, because it's getting bad. But after that I went to the Gap (to shop, not to work) and spent an obscene amount of money on my neice and nephew. They are gonna look sooooo cute though! Then it was home to get ready, then Shaun and I went to dinner at this Thai place in Birmingham that had the worst service I've had at a restaurant in a long, long time, and then we all met up at the Blarney before heading to the bars in Novi. Michigan is so strange. Shaun said later in the evening that we drove all the way to Novi to go to Royal Oak. Which couldn't be more true. They have all the same bars in every city, Ann Arbor, Royal Oak, Rochester, Novi. Never spent much time in East Lansing but I betcha those are the same too. And even if it isn't exactly the same name, it still feels the same once you walk inside. Nikki and I don't really notice so much, because when we go out to dance we are just about shakin' our booties and having a good time, but when there are fights breaking out on the dance floor it's just no good. I miss my favorite one-of-a-kind bar in Ann Arbor: Mitch's. I don't even know if it's still there. :( Good times were always had in that bar, that is for sure. But anyway.

It was good to see Linda. Crazily enough she was with Marc Henderson (younger bro of Matt, the Marine, whose family and mine have been friends since forever). The hilarious part was that he didn't even recognize me! I guess he is a friend of Linda's boyfriend, and as introductions were being made I was like, "Marc?!" He looked at me with complete confusion. Didn't have the foggiest. It's OK though, I guess all those hours of playing capture the flag and hide-and-go-seek out in the woods with his older brother and my younger brother when we were 7, 8, 9, 10, years old were pretty forgettable.

The weekend ended with me working all freaking day on Sunday. Gap was from 12-5 and then to Comcast from 7-11. What did I do with my 2 hour break you ask? Well, Shaun said, "Come over, I'll make you dinner." So over to his place I went. Wow do I love that man. He had *homemade* pizza and cheesey breadsticks ready (straight outta the oven actually) for me when I walked in the door. And it was so so so good! All in all, not a bad Thanksgiving weekend. I can't wait til everyone is home over Christmas. :)

*Wishlist*

Dear Santa,

This year for Christmas I want a lot of stuff. Most of is totally unreasonable (like the $1000 camera, I pretty much know I'm not getting that one!), but some of it is rather do-able. So here goes nothin'.


1. Books, of any kind, from any bookstore, but especially big books with lots of beautiful pictures in them. Like Gordon Parks' photos, or Mary Cassat's paintings. Or you could just get me a Borders gift card.


2. Music, but particularly three CDs. Kanye West's new one, Mariah's absurdly titled "The Emancipation of Mimi" and Madonna's AMAZING "Confessions on a Dance Floor." I mean for the love, look at the freaking woman. She's 40+ years old and looks better than most 20 year olds. Granted, she can afford a personal trainer and a personal chef and Botox and plastic surgery -- none of which I think I would EVER want. Except maybe the personal chef. That'd be pretty sweet. But I digress. Back to the task at hand.

3. An iPOD. *sigh* Sad, but true. I want one. But I think I want the black one. The 30 GB one. Which is more space than I might ever use, but it's better to have and not need than to need and not have. (Please, no mention of how I do not 'need' an iPOD, how I simply want one, and how there are really only a few basic human needs -- like food, water, clothing, shelter, love, and - as some would argue - cable. Christmas is not about need, it is about want, and so I do.)


4. This ridiculous, extravagent, amazingly cool digital SLR Canon camera. I'll let the picture do the talking...... OK, I was going to let the picture do all the talking, but then I realized that it's a picture. It can't talk. Oh man. If only I had an extra $1000 laying around, unused, undesignated. It would be mine. I love SLR's, and since digital is the way of the future, it seems only logical to invest in a nice digital SLR. It's an investment, like a diamond, or a college education. (Shaun, I can see the look on your face! Hahaha...!) Maybe someday if I hit the Keno jackpot up at the Blarney. But til then, it's on to the next item. Which, incidentally, is much more affordable and realistic.



5. Clinique! I've been out of my Happy for a while now, and I just don't want to spend the money on myself at this particular time. I'd be open to a new scent, since I've worn Happy for so very long, but I know I love this one, so that makes it a safe bet. If you really want to make me smile you'll get the lotion and body wash too! Yay! Merry Clinique.


And last but not least, 6. Jewelry. I love big, dangly earrings (like from Urban Outfitters or Claire's or Banana Republic), as long as they aren't too heavy. (They're also usually quite cheap!) I also own no (yellow) gold, real or otherwise, so it's best to stick to silver. Please avoid rainbow themed baubles, as I am neither 3 years old nor same-gender oriented. I am in absolute love with this necklace from Tiffany's (partly because it is just cool, and partly because it doesn't say "T&Co." all over it -- why do they have to do that to all their silver jewelry, I hate it!) But alas, it is not so cheap as one might hope.


So, Santa, there you have it. My Christmas 2005 Wishlist. I think I've been a pretty good girl, whaddya say??

Also, if you are reading this and your name is Stephanie, Rebeca, Aubrey, Jetta, Alyssa, Amy, Thomas, Starla, Sean or Sarah, Anders, or Neil, you would do well to email me your newest addresses, since my address book has managed to get itself lost. (The nerve I tell you.) I would like to send Christmas cards and/or gifts and/or coupons to save mucho dinero at the Gap the 1st weekend in December.

I am so effing happy it's snowing words cannot express. Yay!

Who Needs AAA?

I've got my dad. I mean seriously, look at this face. Tell me this is not the face of a man who can just look menacingly at a car and will it to start. Or else. It's almost as if he uses The Force. I cannot count how many times I have called my dad at some obscene time of the night (or early morning), usually when it is butt ass cold outside, and uttered the words, "Daddy, my car won't start." My senior year of college my car at the time (a Mercury Tracer) decided to die when Lys and I went to the Wings game. In February. Of course it was negative a million degrees out and when Dad said, "Where are you?" I was dreading having to say, "The Cobo roof." Eeek. Even though two perfectly nice fellow Wings fans had unsuccessfully tried to jump start the car for almost 30 minutes, Dad had no problems whatsoever. He connected the cables, started his truck, and *poof* my car started. It's like the cars fear him. They sure don't fear AAA.

I've known people who have AAA and I've heard horror stories about having to wait two hours for roadside assistance. Two hours? Pshaw! Try 28 minutes. That's how long it took my dad to get to me tonight, even with a head cold. (Although, I did make him pancakes last week when he was home sick with an earlier and much worse phase of the cold. And I always get him good Christmas presents, if I do say so myself.) Plus he has all those memories of me when I was a cute little kid, all giggles and dolls and pink dresses, and no dad could ever let his daughter, who was once his little girl, fend for herself when her car won't start. I mean, what kind of a dad would do that? Plus, he knows he has The Force on his side, which ordinary humans simply do not have. And he also has boots like this:

Which I highly suspect of some seriously major supernatural power only possessed by fathers who would do anything for their families.

Thanks to Mike who let me sit in his car to stay warm while waiting for my dad (man, I would have frozen my butt off if not for that!). And thank you Daddy, for saving me yet again.

The Mysterious Case of the Pink Gorilla

So, I have been The Girl in The Relationship with The Boy when everything is fine and dandy and then BAM! One day the Pink Gorilla walks in, uninvited, to a party you are hosting and you both pretend not to notice because gorillas aren't pink, they are black, and who knows if maybe you are cracking up or going bananas or what!? So you both go on, and the Pink Gorilla moves in and starts sleeping nights on your couch. He eats dinner with you and noone talks to or about him. He smirks under all that fuschia fur, and he waits. Then one day, when one of you has reached The Breaking Point, dinner forks are dropped with vigor or dresser drawers are slammed shut and you finally yell, "What the hell is up with the fricking Pink Gorilla??!!" Then one of you is packing up boxes and putting them into a car and moving back in with your parents/best friend/sister or brother. And the other is left sitting with your head in your hands while the Pink Gorilla snickers mercilessly before shuffling off to his next pair of victims.

The other day Shaun and I were curled up on the couch watching The Food Network, when his apartment door opened and lo and behold, the Pink Gorilla stuck his head in. Shaun and I looked at each other; I just laughed and laughed, and Shaun said, "Holy shit! Did you see that big ass pink gorilla?!" We gave him a banana and sent him on his way. Then we went back to watching Iron Chef America. Crazy how I love this man.

Inexplicable

There are some things I will always know. Things I can see with my eyes closed, in the dark, at 2 a.m., on a mountain, in the Andes. Things like my mother's laugh, the way my dad's hand moves as it brushes crumbs out of his beard, my brother's upper lip and the way it curls when he's telling a lie. And then there are the things I will never know. How did Shakespeare manage to cram all that meaning into iambic pentameter? Why Nick had to die like that. And how to explain something you are feeling so deeply you feel it should require no explanation, to a person who just simply doesn't know, and might not ever understand. How to explain that it does not mean that they are doing something wrong for not knowing, and that I am not doing something wrong by failing to come up with the right words. How to explain that I feel my heart tense and drop a little bit every time the subject is brought up -- or shot down. How to explain that I'm sorry, even though I probably have nothing to be sorry for.